The 'F' word

The way that ideas are spread nowadays is not the problem, it’s the way they’re assimilated. So is this word, which follows you around like a trending hashtag, little bit of this here, little bit of that there.

Yes, the word is “feminism”.

I can almost see half of the crowd mouthing “Ugh, not again.”, and that is an exhibit of how unfortunately misinterpreted the whole idea behind the word is. It has been now included in the list of the most famous “isms” that people either debate about without concluding, or be indifferent about without introspecting.  Fact of the matter? Yes it deserves your attention now more than ever.

I’m not going to start naming the things that women have been facing since time immemorial. We’re all very much aware of all that. And we’re the first ones to change channels when there’s a disturbing report about a rape, assault, or acid-attack case on the television, because we'd rather spent the day in indifference than in worry. 

It’s a boon that the people of today have started raising questions. They are now making their own rules and embracing radical ideas.  Calling themselves “rebels”, all in an attempt to break free. When you’re holding your breath underwater for too long, the first gulp of air you breath in on coming to the surface is an enormous one, right? The same way, decades of patriarchy and internal turmoil has led to an extreme outrage for women nowadays. They are grasping desperately at ropes that’ll save them from falling, which they didn’t know they could do earlier. So much so that this extremism has wrongly taken the road of the idea not of “equality of females”, but “dominance of females”.

A certain class of women have made the term “feminism” almost scary for men in particular, merely by hollering around the streets, which has led to a major misconception about this issue. This, my dear friends, is ‘pseudo-feminism.’ I’ve seen people backing off from these discussions just because they fear a hormonal power-hungry pseudo-feminist would come clawing at them. And that is just beyond unfortunate. Yes, it’s derived from “feminine”, but it does NOT mean hating on men for no reason at all. Sexism definitely should be called out, even if it is subtle. But there is no reason for a gender divide here. For men, it does not make them less of a man if you really understand what it’s like to be hearing things like “Sharam kar, ladki ne beizzati kardi!” (“A girl dissed you? What a shame!”) and many little comments like this on a regular basis.

Men and women both have had equal shares of problems, I agree. But what I don’t agree with is “whattaboutery”, wherein the problems that men face are raised only when a rape or an assault case comes up. Until then, nothing. This is escapism, folks. Adding the third problem to the list does not help in striking off the first. Lots to say.